Photo of the Day- 22january2009

I’m Not a Doctor But I Did Play One On TV.

Somehow today I got roped into going to Chad’s house for 4 hours and working on his computers.

It was not fun, and it did not go well.

22january2009-dharma-initiative-compter-repairman

This is an action shot. It’s about an hour in and I think I am saying, if I remember correctly, “I would punch you in the face right now if you weren’t holding that baby.”

One Year Ago…

I moved onto Dupre Road, into a house known as Casa de Dupre, when I began working at Ridgedale Baptist Church. Chad Poe, my best good friend lived next door and life was good.

But we didn’t have internet. So we decided we would go in halvsies on internet with a wireless router. So as to not feel guilty about one of us possibly “stealing” the internet from the other we started our very own coffee house which we called Casa of Coffee de Dupre.

Life was good and business was slow but steady, and we had no complaints. Doogie and Vinnie just livin’ the life!

Or so I thought. Apparently Chad’s house wasn’t getting a good signal from my wireless router unless he was on Hope’s shoulders in the far corner of their guest bedroom with their ceiling fan on high and their kitchen sink faucet running. He couldn’t always get a signal in his living room and never in his dining room. Tired of this (and because his wife was secretly jealous of our very successful coffee business) he ended our partnership and got internet at his house.

Chad is not very tech savvy. He’s not very “hook things up” especially when it includes splitters and routers and installation of… anything so, today, when he decided to stop splitting the internet at Casa of Coffee de Dupre with me (thus resulting in it costing me an extra $23 a month) he called me over to help.

I thought it was gonna be a quick install, just plugging in a couple of things here, splitting this, installing that and BOOM! I’d be out of there, buuuuuttttt nooooooo, it turned into the install from Yugoslavia.

(That is a reference to 1993. And Hell. It was a play on time and words.)

An hour and a half in I had to call Ben at 1-800-COMCAST and talk to him about what was wrong with the modem. I did. I, had to call him, the guy who has to pay $23 a month extra and has 3 cupboards full of coffee and no longer has a coffee house business to sell it at, had to talk to Ben from 1-800-COMCAST.

I let him know the situation, how important it was to us, which I tried to illustrate by quoting a Kid Rock song. You are probably are familiar with it… “We didn’t have no internet but man I never will forget the way the moonlight shined upon her hair.”

While Kid Rock was able to remember things, make friends, form memories,  without the Internet, we couldn’t so we needed Ben to fix it.

Eventually he did and that hour and a half our life turned out to be the fun part.

While Chad and Hope were in Mississippi last week a friend of Hope’s, feeling sorry for them for having the BoBo computer someone had donated to the church who had donated it to Chad and Hope, sent home with them a brand used Gateway desktop computer.

Kid Rock hasn’t written a song about their Gateway computer but he should because it is ancient.  It had a floppy disc port and an “I ♥ ALF” sticker on the side of the tower. It was ancient.

The computer was wiped clean, nothing on it, but it came with a little cow patterned notebook full of discs. Some of them were labeled, and some of them were not. Chad kept handing me CD’s to put in to try to load up so that we could install the wireless usb card so the desktop could also have internet access.

Again, Chad is not very tech savvy. He kept handing me CD”s about photo editing and sound enhancement. In his defense not all of them were labeled but some… some were. I guess it is my fault for not taking charge but he really wanted to help so he would read the label on the disc cover and decide it was a disc that needed to be loaded so I would load it.

The wireless usb card needed the computer to have Windows ’98 or Office or XP, etc to be able to be installed. I emphasized this to Chad and he began to hand me CD’s that at least made a little more sense. Office Works and Microsoft Media CD’s.

“Does this have Windows on it?” I’d ask… and he would say, “Yeah… I think…”

But they didn’t.

Finally after FOREVER and many many discs and restarts we finally got the computer loaded up with Microsoft XP and were able to install the wireless usb card.

And I know some of you think I am exaggerating about this Gateway desktop so I am gonna include a few more BONUS  pictures below.

BONUS Photos of the Day:

The computer was old. Really old. If it would have had anything saved on it it would have been pictures of Blossom and Sixx and a list of reasons why Kirk Cameron was cuter than John Stamos.

But it didn’t, it didn’t have anything on it. So we had to load it on there…

22january2009-dharma-initiative-compter-repairman-5

Seriously, I’m pretty sure this used to be Doogie Howser’s computer. And just to be clear, in this scenario I am Doogie and Chad is the goofy best friend Vinnie.

At one point it made us type in the number we were going to use for internet access. And we had to choose “touch tone” or “pulse”.

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(Our phone number, by the way, was 481-516-2342.)

And it was SLOW. It was sooo slow.

1996 slow. It was Keri Strug slow. After she broke her ankle slow.

22january2009-dharma-initiative-compter-repairman-3

Let’s take a closer look at that… it doesn’t say 90 seconds… it doesn’t say 2 to 4 minutes… it doesn’t say 8 minutes remaining… it says… let’s take a closer look…

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39 minutes. 39 MINUTES!

GEEZ O’ PETE!

As I write this I am watching this week’s How I Met Your Mother and I just want to run over to Chad’s “new” desktop and type:

Dear Diary,

Tonight I saw myself in the future… apparently I turn out to be awesome!

Doogie

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2 Responses to “Photo of the Day- 22january2009”

  1. Erin Says:

    You got your dinner for free that night. Don’t complain. You are welcome, by the way.

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