Photo of the Day- 04march2009

04march2009-dogzilla

DOGZILLA!

This is not the best picture of the day (shows a little too much ankle and not enough of my face) but it was my favorite part of the day.

I had to drop by Community Kids this afternoon to give Ms Joyce something. (Community Kids is an Afterschool Program that is a ministry of Ridgedale Baptist Church) While I was there I spent some time hanging out in Ms Ashley’s room. The kids were reading books and after we hung out for a while talking about all kinds of whatever, Ms Ashley asked me if I would read a book.

I said of course I would!

The book they chose for me was

04march2009-dogzilla-the-book

Seriously, this is a real book. That children read.

And it goes basically the way you would expect a book called Dogzilla to go…

It is set in Mousopolis, which is a mouse city. They, the mice, are having their First Annual Bar-B-Que Festival when a giant dog attacks the city. Where did the giant dog come from? The house next door? From the woods near Mousopolis? From outer space?

No, Dogzilla comes from a giant erupting volcano.

I know what you are thinking: A Giant Erupting Volcano??? That doesn’t even make sense!!

Listen, it is a giant dog attacking a mouse town during their first annual bar-b-que festival, I don’t think that it coming from a giant erupting volcano should be your biggest problem with this.

Anyway, Dogzilla comes out of a giant erupting volcano and scared all the mice. At this point you should know that this book had all the cliches you can think of for mice or for dogs. For example, when Dogzilla first came and scared off the mice Mayor McCheese said, “Where are you going? Are you mice or men???”

The mice said, “We are MICE!”

And Mayor McCheese said, “Oh yeah!” and they ran away.

The story continued…

“Next the dog went through Mousopolis doing what dogs do.”

I stopped and said, “Do you know what dogs do?”

One kid said, “Poop.”

I said, “No, cartwheels.”

“Can you guess what Dogzilla’s weapon of choice was?” I said.

Before they could answer “poop” I said, “Doggy Breath.”

And can you guess how the mice and Mayor McCheese decided to fight it?

“With what all dogs hate…”

Midgets.

No, no, I am just kidding… the mice and Mayor McCheese fought off Dogzilla with a fire truck from the Mousopolis Fire Department. They thought that dogs hate baths so why not shoot it in the face with water.

And believe or not it worked! They shot Dogzilla in the face with water and it ran back and jumped into the giant erupting volcano.

I know what you are thinking, Dogzilla jumped back into the giant erupting volcano??? That doesn’t even make sense!

Again, remember, we are talking about a giant dog and a town of mice bar-b-queing… something.

The best part was the end, we flash forward a year into the future and the town has been rebuilt (oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, Dogzilla destroyed Mousopolis.) and they are having the Second Annual Bar-B-Que Festival.

WOOO-WHOOO!! VICTORY!!!!

and then on the next to last page it said, “But then came something they weren’t expecting…”

and you turn to the last page it said, “PUPPIES!!!” with giant Dogzilla puppies jumping out of the giant erupting volcano!

I know what you are thinking, Giant Dogzilla puppies jumping out of the giant erupting volcano??? That doesn’t even make sense!!

But what is more disturbing is that even our ridiculous children’s books about dogs attacking a mouse town are setting themselves up for sequels. Hollywood really is corrupting our children…’s book writers.

white-box7

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One Response to “Photo of the Day- 04march2009”

  1. megan Says:

    ahh, I totally read that book when I was younger!

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